Forgiveness

Over the past few weeks I have felt that God was not near in my life. I kind of felt alone and wondered where God went, I knew he wouldn’t leave me but I still felt alone. A few days of things (some good and some not so good) started happening around me that showed me that yes, God never left me alone he was always right near me.
I read something that did not seem “real” and called a friend, whom I trust and walks closely with Jesus. I just didn’t understand why I was feeling like something just wasn’t right. I feel now that I should have let God sort the feelings in my head before I called my friend. I feel like I jumped the gun so to speak instead of going to God first. Now, I am wondering if I should go to the person who wrote the paper and ask for forgiveness because I doubted parts of what was written just because some of the words did not seem “real” to me. In going, I would be afraid I would hurt feelings and I surely don’t want that to happen. I keep telling myself “Who am I to judge what was written?! I really don’t know what to do.

On Saturday, my boys and I went to look for a Christmas tree. They have never experienced picking out a real Christmas tree. We walked around and looked at all of them and I told the boys we needed to pick a tree from this row. So we walked and discussed why we didn’t like this on or that one. Then, Casey yelled out this one mommy! Of course, I asked why. He said, It has a cross on this branch! Sure enough it did. There is cross shaped branches all over the tree but the one branch Casey saw was straight across and straight down. I told Casey, that this must be our tree and we brought it home.


In my bible study “Esther” this morning, we were learning about the great garden party of King Xerxes. At this party, I learned that there was quite a bit of lavish decoration of hangings of white and blue ribbon, couches of god and silver and wine that were served in gold goblets. The part that caught my eye was that each gold goblet was designed different! With feelings that has been stirring makes me wonder “Where all the goblets different because God makes all his children different”? I went to Worship Service and the stage was decorated with beautiful Christmas trees that shined brightly in Gold and Silver and the message was on Forgiving! So you think that sparked my attention? Of course it did. A song was sung during the service that I had heard many times before however, third verse stood out to me. The song was El Shaddi by Amy Grant which means God Almighty. It brought me to remember that the time of Christ is near and there are people who are all different that don’t know who Messiah is. That I need to scatter and show people His Word that contains the plan and shows his most awesome work that was done through his Son.

Could all this be coincidence that this seems to be happening within a few days apart? No, Coincidences are miracles in which God prefers to remain anonymous. Even though I couldn’t see or hear God, he has always been there. Teaching me a few lessons!!!